...Well I havent written for a while, mostly having to do with the fact that i was foolish enough to belive i no longer have an eating disorder because i was able to go about 3 days without b/p or restricting.... Bravo ED ill give you props, you sure know how to string me up like a puppet, i follow your every comand, just wonderful. How i love my abusive relationship....
On a different note... I HATE THERPAY.... wait... i spelled it wrong.. but i think it gets the point across quite nicely, anyway,my therapist... is making me do MORE DBT... yeah i know, ive been in DBT for over a month and i just got out, wohhoo... back in program, story of my life right? But other than a lovley little lapse of recovery by purging today (I have to go to the beach tommorow, and wear a bikini, give me a break) I have been doing quite well... translation, I feel fat and ugly, and have been eating waayy to much damn food to ever amount to anything. So obiviously its a surprise i havent been isolating at all, in fact, im out almost everyday. Even with another girl from treatment, shes still a twig, which never fails to get jelousy from me, especially when we tried on jeans together but shes fun... we even made out in Dicks sporting goods in front of some REALLY HOT skaters .... haha the look on the guy's faces... pricelesss! unfortuntly i later figured out tht one of those guys is from my hghschool, so that will be fun when vacation is over haha
As of right now, the only major problem ive been having latley is sleeping, I've been taking Ambien.. but whatever. I have been up 3 days in a row... this is getting ridiculous.
Well, heres to a better tommorow and a thinner (did i just say that?) future
-Sierra <3
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